There’s a fine line between wanting to be right and wanting to be understood in any argument and they can often look like very much the same thing. We push and push and push to get our point across, relentlessly pursuing a concession. A concession, yes, but of what kind, exactly?
I push because I assume you don’t understand my point. After all, I think, if you truly understood, you couldn’t possibly still believe I was wrong and you were right. But then what if you demonstrated you absolutely understood? What if you took a moment to not only acknowledge what I was saying, but that you understood why I was saying it, why it made sense to me? What if you did all that, and then told me why you STILL disagree? I suppose I would have to listen to what you were saying, or at least stop pushing my point.
And who knows, maybe if I truly understood what you were saying, if I took the time to demonstrate I absolutely understood, maybe I wouldn’t still believe I was right. Or maybe I just wouldn’t care so much about being right anymore. Either way, it’s worth a try.
